Pregnancy is a wierd and wonderful thing. I have experienced some pretty freaky things to happen to me socially and physically since being pregnant. Here is my list of freaky pregnancy issues that nobody told me about!
1) Stranger Danger
All social norms of interaction with strangers, work colleagues and others get forgotten when you are pregnant. You will be told at times that you look big, or huge or ‘absolutely massive’. The hilarious jokers will ask ‘Are you sure it’s not twins?!’ (Yeah i’m pretty sure mate). You will also be touched a lot which is odd for me as I am cuddly person but very much on my own terms. People don’t usually touch each other’s tummies in public. I do find it odd that strangers like to pat my tummy like I’m a big teddy bear. There is no personal space boundaries anymore. Some people are lovely and wish you well but most just want to tell you you are big and you will be bigger yet. Thanks.
2) Hairy Tum
Yes I have got extra hair on my belly. I told you this list was going to be freaky. I did not expect this and I was not warned this may happen. I’m not talking huge amounts of hair, I have not morphed into a yeti, but I have a definite fuzzy down which just isn’t very nice. I’m not sure why I am fuzzy it could be because baby is a boy and there is testosterone concentrated on my tum or it could be because my belly is growing and needs warmth for winter. Or it could be that I am literally turning into a teddy bear. I don’t know, but it is a furry bump that I did not sign on for!
3) Skin Issue overkill
If you have any skin condition no matter how slight before you are pregnant it will be made worse by ten fold. I had a bit of eczema and sensitive skin. Whilst I have been pregnant I developed an allergy to eyeshadows and certain eyeliners which resulted in eczema developing on my eyelids and eyebrows. I also developed a red sore rash around my nose and a patch on my neck. At the same time I have got eczema really badly on my hands and to top it off hormonal spots around my chin. So I have been enjoying the beauty of my ‘pregnancy glow’ no end.
4) The Joy of Peeing
Oh the peeing! When they joke on films and tv that pregnant women need to pee it is not an exaggeration. In my first trimester I peed probably every hour and now I’m in my final trimester it hasn’t really stopped. I need to pee at all times and I can always go. I have to suss out the loo wherever I am just like on a plane, I need to know where all the exits are. I haven’t been caught short too many times but the new development is peeing whilst I laugh like a little old woman. Delightful.
5) Baby Brain
Yes baby brain is real and I really am losing it. Recently I went to a supermarket to buy ingredients for Shepherds Pie. I came out with mince beef, a new nightie, some candles, Hot Chocolate sachets and rhubarb crumble. Yes I did. It wasn’t till later I realised as I thought I had completed a good shop. I also knitted a hat and boot set in what I thought was white but was actually cream. I lose complete track of sentences and at work I have number blindness and to be honest sometimes have no idea who I’m speaking to on the phone or why. I’m a danger to the public which is why my maternity leave should start now!
6) Nana Naps
I could have a Nana Nap at any point in the day. Period. Work is the hardest as I am tempted to crawl under my desk and sleep for a long time and I could do this at any point but especially at 4pm. I yawn all the time during the day and fall asleep in front of the telly like a full on Nana. But the really annoying thing is I can sleep very heavily when I first go to sleep but after the first pee of the night I can then lie awake for hours thinking about everything in the world and how I can solve the issue and not actually be sleeping at all. Even though I am absolutely knackered. It’s a conundrum a real conundrum.
7) Food Glorious Food
As well as sleep at any point I can eat at any point. I could eat a lot before and I have joked that I have a bottomless pit for a stomach as I am hungry all the time but now I am extremely hungry. I am so hungry I can eat a three course meal at any point. I am also in love with all condiments and vinegar. I have a deep love for Tartar Sauce on most things. As well as ketchup and vinegar. I had a chippy tea with my family recently and I had fish, chips, mushy peas, curry sauce, tartar sauce, ketchup, and vinegar and I have to say it was an utter delight.
So these are my freaky facts. Please don’t get me wrong I am overjoyed to be expecting and love my little baby so much but when your body goes through so many changes it’s hard to not appreciate the utter weirdness of this situation.